13.04.07
trillion - updated 75 days ago
75 days is a long time. A lot can happen in 75 days. A went away for a month and a half to Vietnam. A lot happened for him, travelling through some of the most deserted areas of Vietnam on the back of a motorbike. For me, that time brought me closer to him than ever. I realised that everything in life is a choice, and that usually the hardest choices (at least initially) are usually the most rewarding. And I realised that A is something that I want to choose, that he isn't an easy choice, but that he's certainly rewarding. I thought that any other choice would be boring.
A came back two days ago, and as soon as he walked in the door he told me that two days before that he'd slept with a Vietnamese girl. He told me and I just sat there. I hadn't wanted to sit there when he asked me to, but after he told me I couldn't move. I asked him about the details and he told me, but I still didn't get angry. He was tired and hungry from his flight so I made him go and have a shower and I cooked him some noodles.
Thinking about it just makes me tired. I don't even think I can be bothered writing this. I thought that by writing this maybe I could make sense of some of the things that have happened, but it doesn't seem to be helping.
I hate that I'm now the girl that forgives her cheating boyfriend.
3:44 p.m.